A few years back, well, I guess it’d have to be five years or so since Ace was in preschool, Grandpa Dutty (dad) and I went to do some Christmas shopping a couple of days before Christmas.
Because he was unable to find anything suitable for his lovely wife (my mom), his wad of cash had not been depleted and it was burning a hole in his pocket. The exhaustion of dealing with right before Christmas day mall type people all afternoon, plus the remaining wad of cash in dad’s pocket led us to the (inevitable) solution of going to happy hour.
Happy hour for us used to consist of a few buckets of beer and some appetizers. On this occasion, and I’d be lying if I said it was unusual, my then four year old daughter, Ace, joined us as well. She enjoys eating out and playing pull tabs is one of her favorite activities. We drank bucket after bucket until our wives came, cut us off and drove us home.
The next day, my wife informed me that as she was talking to Ms. Mary (teacher) while dropping Ace off at her little Catholic preschool in the morning, suddenly, Ace began pulling beer bottle caps out of her pants pockets and started handing them to Ms. Mary.
“The red ones are Pawpaw’s and the blue ones are my daddy’s!” she proudly explained.
I still chuckle as I imagine the mortified look on momma’s face as her precious little girl was pulling bottlecap after bottlecap from who knows where and kept handing them to her teacher. Apparently, there were a lot! “Oh my, these are all from yesterday?” Ms. Mary asked.
Don’t you judge us lady!
Luckily, Ms. Mary was a good sport, and I’m pretty sure a hearty drinker herself. I believe it may be a prerequisite for Catholic school teaching, in fact.
That was a long time ago, because I don’t really drink the Bud Light anymore unless it’s in a pinch. I’m a Bud Light Lime man (oxymoron?) now, so momma’s humiliation would look more like this nowadays.
Aren’t children delightful?
And Ace isnt’ the only one in on the fun. Cdawg thought he could hang with daddy on the beach recently and was totally put in his place after only being able to take a couple of drinks before passing out like a lightweight.
Cdawg is really more of a liquor man anyway.
Good Lord, do you see a trend here?
Those days are long behind us now, as the third one, G$, has all but obliterated any shot I/we had at a social life. Happy Hours have been replaced with extra work shifts needed to feed and diaper these monsters, and when I do get a chance to drink (which by a normal persons’ standards is still frequently) it’s almost always at home, on my couch. I can take the $12 hit of a 12 pack much more easily than the ginormous bills we were racking up by going out to drink. Happy hour prices, indeed! Still a rip.