Do men still have midlife crises?
If yes, I’m not 100% sure that I’ve had mine yet.
I thought I did once, back in 2003, but now I’m pretty sure I just went insane, temporarily.
Wait, isn’t that what a midlife crisis is, some sort of temporary insanity? Maybe I did have one then.
I don’t want to miss my one chance to be irrational, demanding and crazy (sound familiar once a month, ladies?) and blame it on nature.
Unrelated to any sort of midlife crisis for sure, I wore my wife out with weeks and weeks and possibly even months of incessant begging and/or dropping hints until I finally
was given permission to went ahead and bought myself a motorcycle.
That was in 2007.
Ain’t she a beaut?
I rode her hard for years until it…wait.
That’s not my bike at all. I’ve been hacked or something.
Here it is. She’s still a beaut though, right?
That’s Ace and I riding in our shorts and flip flops, sans helmets back when Ace was maybe four years old.
That’s right, child and motorcycle safety advocacy groups, suck on that!
That bike and I have had some good times together.
My favorites were when the old lady (that’s what you HAVE to call your wife or lady friend when you’re talking about motorcycles, so get off my back, feminists types…I love and respect women AND rules of group etiquette!!) would jump on back and ride with me.
Our first longish ride was into Missouri wine country one evening after work.
It was a beautiful 70 degree evening when we took off from home.
Unfortunately, 70 degrees feels different at night on a motorcycle doing 70 mph than it does in the sunshine.
It was cold as a witch’s tit coming back and we had to stop at Walmart to get some sweatshirts to ward off hypothermia.
We used to ride with a large group on Sundays from time to time as well.
That was mostly when we just had Ace to unload onto grandma and grandpa.
After CDawg was born, the riding consisted of mostly me alone trips.
Then when G$ came along, those me alone trips were mostly to go grab diapers or groceries from the store in town.
I sold my motorcycle yesterday.
The wife and I miss her already.
I could kid myself by saying the bike was some sort of symbol of better times, but if I’m honest with myself, my better times are now with wife and all three kids, alive and able to move without a wheel chair.
I wanted the money to take care of some things around the house and a little debt.
I also wanted the garage space.
The motorcycle had become less of a recreational vehicle and more of a carnival ride for the kids around the neighborhood.
It got to the point where I was thinking about how horrific it will be to die on that motorcycle. Death was always just over the next hill or around the next bend.
I was having these thoughts WHILE I WAS RIDING!
That’s no good.
I’m an old man now I guess.
I like the safety of doors and floors and roofs.
There are too many idiots texting and driving and talking on phones and driving and facebooking and driving and blogging and driving…it’s seriously dangerous out on those roads.
A wise old man, who I used to ride with a lot, once told me that there are two groups of motorcyclists, those who’ve wrecked their bikes and those who haven’t wrecked their bikes yet.
While the former group sounds tougher and probably has better stories to blog about, I decided to get out before I could join them.
I’ve got enough blog material with these kids for now without having to endure a near death experience…