A burglar who puts his nuts on your forehead? Yeah, vote for that one!

Well, it’s that time of the week again my friends! Time to vote for your favorite week 2 post by donofalltrades right here on the Blogger-Idol site!!

The assignment was to write a newspaper article detailing a fictitious crime you’ve committed.

Mine involves a man pushed too far by inconsiderate drivers and an incorrect Moons Over My Hammy breakfast plate. See what roles Jack Hoff and Tubby Middle play and whether or not police spokesman Harry Ballsacht has good news for the community.

Check out what the critics have to say about my post:

“Fucking amazing! I laughed while I read it on the shitter!” – Me

“What are you even talking about? Please tell me you’re going to do a good job cleaning the kitchen and not do it half-assed as usual?” – My wife

“I gotta admit, I can’t read. I just pretended to read this for a minute because you said you’d give me two dollars to say something nice about it. I’m sure it’s good. Can I have your lunch too?” – Some homeless guy by the bus stop

“You, you sir, are one funny bastard…” – Manderstanding

“I started to get a little lost…abrupt…Nice work!” Non Stop Mom

“Your writing made me chuckle quite a bit…hilarious and out-there content….stabby” -Crazed In The Kitchen

“This was great. Omg – Ballsacht? So creative and entertaining. Or should I call you Nutsonface?” – Ice Scream Mama

“I LOVED the names! I got a little lost…hard to follow…rushed…a bit unorganized…Good job!” – Razorblade Brain

“Sir, please get off the bus now!” – The new bus driver

As  you can see, the reviews are great! Go read about my crime and vote for Donofalltrades!!! I will love you for it!

This entry was posted in Humor, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

18 Responses to A burglar who puts his nuts on your forehead? Yeah, vote for that one!

  1. Jolene says:


  2. Cheryl says:

    Voted! (Yes, Don… for you. LOL!) Very funny piece. I’m still giggling.

  3. It was so short. I kept asking myself, “Where are the other 8000 words?”
    Now I have an hour to kill.

  4. Susan Murphy says:


  5. momtimes4 says:

    Voted for you! Equal parts funny, gross, and disturbing.

  6. djmatticus says:

    One more vote for DOAT!
    Hilarious, as expected, as always, as the Blogger Idol public demands. 😉

  7. Blogdramedy says:

    You couldn’t get better reviews if you wrote them yourself. Wait. Never mind.

    I’ll vote. Possibly for you. *grin*

  8. findingninee says:

    I WILL love it and OMG who was that Used Ta Be Hottie but Now Old in the photo?

  9. lisleman says:

    Great reviews – also how did you find an honest homeless guy?
    I need to browse over and read this. Do I get $2?

  10. Riveting and at the same time revolting. Comedy, drama, pathos, genitalia…the feel good fake crime story of the season!

  11. Abby says:

    omg you are freakin hilarious….sick but hilarious. i am looking forward to more!

  12. pegoleg says:

    Love is great and all, Don, but true appreciation requires cash. (great story!)

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