Is this what old timers talk about at McDonalds at 6am?

I just got off the phone with a buddy of mine.

We went to college together and suffered through biology labs and hangovers at each others’ side for four years.

We thought back then, when we still had some ambition, that we would someday find a cure for the common hangover. We were going to do our testing on squirrels. Many squirrels would be harmed in the process.

I thought we’d be rich by now for having done so.

Neither of us is rich for having done so yet.

Apparently, curing the common hangover or getting rich via some other route requires doing more than nothing and hoping it all just happens while you’re taking a nap.

Anyway, we had a 17 minute phone conversation to plan a weekend when his family could come stay with us and putz around together.

The last 2 minutes were spent addressing the weekend, but it’s the first 15 minutes of conversation that has me thinking.

We discussed, in no particular order of importance, his family’s credit card debt and how they’ve gotten themselves out of debt, his high blood pressure, my possible high blood pressure, our bad backs, how our kids are doing in school, doctor visits and insurance, and we ended by him telling me that he believes he has gout and explaining to me what gout is.

Gout?

Geez, is there any disease that sounds more like an old man disease than gout?

This reminded me of another conversation that I had a few years ago when I ran into a guy at work who was a real ladies man when we were young police officers.

I can’t explain why this conversation has always stuck with me. I guess it felt like one of those “oh, no, not you too? You’re too cool to be saddled with a wife and kids” sort of thing.

We were work friends, but he and I never ran in the same crowd. We’d see each other at bars and events, and he always had a different hottie on his arm.

I ran into him at work shortly after hearing that he had a baby.

He immediately showed me a picture of his newborn and we talked at length about babies, boppies, babysitters, breast pumps and onsies.

It was pathetic.

We used to talk about beer and golf and women and football and beer and fuzzball and other manly stuff.

Now it’s all about the babies. Don’t forget to stop for milk and tampons on your way home, right?

Two grown men shouldn’t know what a boppy is, let alone be discussing their comfort and convenience over a cup of coffee without a woman in sight to be impressed with our love for our children and boppy knowledge.

While I was talking to my old college pal on the phone, he indicated that he had a bit of a hangover from being out on the town the night before. That same night, I’d also drank too much beer and topped it off with an entire bottle of wine, which was punishing me as well.

We both wished we’d developed that hangover cure.

It was just like old times.

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24 Responses to Is this what old timers talk about at McDonalds at 6am?

  1. Mancakes says:

    It DOESN’T happen while taking a nap? Wait…what?

  2. I’ve got some squirrels for ya if you take up that testing! I give you bonus points for knowing what a boppie is! Thanks for visiting my blog!

  3. What in the world is a boppy?

    • You’re a lucky man to not know.

      • I am a lucky woman not to know, at least according to me. I had to look it up. It looks like one of those special pillows for bad necks.

      • Oh, I’m so sorry for my gender confusion…it’s been a long Monday! I assume you know that you’re a woman and when you say you had to look it up, you meant the boppie, not whether you were a woman, right? Lol. It is basically a pillow as you describe jacked up in price and marketed for the baby crowd. It’s a nice place to hold the baby in the middle of the night while feeding it.

      • That’s all right, it’s a pen name. & I looked down for confirmation πŸ˜‰ I’ll bet the price is jacked up – it’s a glorified neck pillow!

  4. Amber Perea says:

    Hangover cure: (Also derived from College antics but rooted in heavy chemical factors and still works now that I’m old and drink less but when I do, it hurts more)

    2 parts. Night before big glass of water and two ibuprofen (don’t want to mess up those already liquor soaked organs). Bed.
    Wake up. Emergen-C or other 1500 mg + Vitamin C supplement.
    Big glass of H2O.
    Breakfast of a V8 and a banana.
    10-15 later…Coffee.

    Done and done. Works every time. πŸ™‚

    And it’s good to know that someone outside of my husband knows what a Boppy is. πŸ˜‰

    • I like this better than the “don’t drink so much and you won’t have that problem!” solution I hear a lot!

      I’m going to try it!

      • Amber Perea says:

        My roommate all through college was pre-med and the factors that attribute to hangovers are dehydration and vitamin deficiency. Truly. So keep the water intake up if you drink more (think at least a 3:1 ratio of Oz alcohol to H2O intake) and the vitamins C and overload of Potassium will take care of the “ugh” feeling. Topping that off with caffeine and you have all of the factors that cause you to feel terrible the next day out of the equation. πŸ™‚ I still use it! Works like a charm. πŸ™‚

  5. rebecca2000 says:

    Awww I love it. First you mentioned tampons in a post not me. I am making good. You’re going to owe me one, big time. As for aches and pains… you are getting old. Alcohol makes you forget that fact. πŸ˜‰ NADS

  6. Maggie O'C says:

    My college girls and I always had such great ideas. It’s that whole do more than nothing thing that hung us up. Still have hangovers, they just hurt more. I’m reading Amber’s comments like it’s the Journal of the AMA.

  7. I don’t have a hangover cure, but I definitely like your comment that grown men should not know what a boppy is. Made me laugh!

  8. barbtaub says:

    Congratulations – you’ve been nominated for a Liebster award! To find out more go to http://wp.me/p2SHpT-cE

  9. Nicholiovich says:

    Peter Pan really had it all figured out.

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